Junk Food is Healthy For You – Study Finds

Eat all the sugar you want, according to scientists.

Junk Food Healthy For You
Photo: A pile of super foods.

A compound in Junk Food may be the key to longevity, new findings presented Monday suggest.

Sucrose, better known as sugar, appears to be an antioxidant. The sweet substance also seems to have immune boosting properties, much like exotic strains of mushrooms and vitamins. It turns out that sugar is the ultimate health food for 2016.

Study authors found that sucrose appears to inhibit oxidation by binding with shitty chemicals and toxins, being diverted directly into your pee and then you pee it out.

The Many Benefits of Sugar

“According to our research, sugar is great for you and you can pretty much just eat as much junk as you want. It’s all good”, said Dr. Winston Herchel of Richington University Food Research Lab. “Eat donuts. Eat cake. Eat whatever you want”, he went on to say.

Further studies will be needed to determine if these health promoting qualities in sugar mean we don’t even have to exercise. Imagine that. Eat junk and sit on your ass. Science!